2:19 PM
Today my appt got moved from Thursday, to Today. I got my US & when going about it, she points out the cyst on my ovary which was causing all my pain but was uh,normal apparently. But says nothing about my baby. Of course I started bawling, my mom was with me because Brandon couldn't get off work with such short notice.She then understands why I am, & says "I guess I should have showed you this first." & there it was my baby eh well, yolk sac. ha But no heart beat, could not see it or hear it. The doctor had to run to the hospital so he left his assistant to tell me about my ultrasound and what not. They claim I am 5w5d (according to my calendar I should be farther along) but I don't think that is right, anyways she says the doctor says everything looks ok, & I don't need blood work. I was confused. But was happy with the good news that everything was a-ok.

Then I get to work, my phone is going off the hook with calls from my Dr. They let me leave work early, & I call. Apparently, the assistant was wrong had everything backwards. Things weren't measuring up, &do not look "up to par" so I needed to get bloodwork. grr.

So, I just got done getting pricked, hopefully I get the results by the end of the day, & then hope they have doubled in 48 hrs. I think after I get it back I can actually say "I'm pregnant".

According my sac (of course this will differ once we can see a baby, I'm lookin at November 28th a Thanksgiving baby! lordwilling)
my bean.


March For Babies!

1:32 PM

Every day, thousands of babies are born too soon, too small and often very sick. Our team is walking in March for Babies because we want to do something about this. I know you care, too. That's why I'm asking you to join us. It's easy: just click the join this team button.
If you can't walk with us, please help by donating to our team. By clicking HERE. Thank you for helping us give all babies a healthy start!

The mission of March of Dimes is to improve the health of babies by preventing birth defects, premature birth and infant mortality.

We are walking for prematurity & it says infant loss, but also miscarriages; babies are babies.


10:18 AM
Thursday is the moment of truth. I have an appt at 2 o'clock!To get all my tests done. pray for me!
not the best picture but oh well, im about 14 dpo.

distracting post.

10:51 AM

So, after I was emailing someone that was asking about one of my dogs, I realized I have never said a word about them! I first should tell you my dogs are my life. Its kind of pathetic, actually. After not working for a year, I spent every hour with them & they are def my lil furry children, & have helped me through alot! So, I will introduce you to my smiles. No matter that I'm going through they make me smile :)

He is my oldest dog, who is now 6. He is a teacup yorkie that has "lil-man syndrome". If your not fimilar with this, it means this dog is about ehh 3 inches of the ground & weights a good 3lbs. & thinks he is a great dane. He rules the roost, & sets all the other dogs straight. If they are barking, or won't get in the cage, he will bite them or round them  up to get them to go in the cage. He is my first little baby, but since he is getting old he generally just sleeps, chases the windshield wipers in the car & barks.....CONSTANTLY!


He was the best birthday present I have ever recieved! But, he wont stop growing. I want him to go to back to the little puppy I had before (the first picture). Bentley, is a shi-tzu. I just know he has begal in him tho, he thinks he is a hunting dog & frequently get lost when not on a leash since he starts sniffin & looks up & does not know where he is! So, unlike the other dogs he has to be on a leash which drives him bonkers. He is almost 2 years old & just learned to bark & hasn't gotten down the whole growling thing yet, which is hilarous. HA he was so spoiled when he was younger he never had to. He also is ahem, "fond" of this giant bunny he has, which he um "dances" (what we tell my nieces) with the bunny for up to 2 hours straight a day. haha He is the dog that will constantly make you laugh with all the silly stuff he does.


I got Amara, a week after my first miscarriage last year on Easter. I had, had dream that my dad had bought me a Pit Bull, & went over to my MIL's and was talking about this dream. She gets this huge smile on her face & said the Pit next door had puppies! I couldn't believe it, I had no idea. So I went over & picked up Amara right away, she was the runt, & you could tell was just a lil sick looking thing. At that moment I fell in love. We of course were not planning on a third dog, but Brandon saw my attachment, and after I left her, he surprised me with taking her home that day. Amara means strength in African. & that is what she was for me when i was mourning. Today, she is still a HUGE baby that thinks she is still 5lbs, she is 57 lbs HA. Did  I meant she snores, louder than a 7 ton man? She is not your "average' pit bull. & people judge her as soon as they hear pit bull,  if you are one of those people, shame on you. Im a firm believer in punish the deed, not the breed. She would never hurt a fly, that & she isn't awake long enough to be a "viscous" creature as the public as portrayed of her breed. I am now a spokesperson for BSL & helping take the status quo away from pitbulls.

So, now you have met my smiles. Yes, I'm quite a dog lady. But, I wouldnt change it for the world :)

x's & oh's


10:49 PM
Well, I didn't take a test today, Brandon says I'm being a compulsive "pee-r" and apparently" i want to pee on everything" haha. But, I get my package of 10 in the mail tomorrow from my fave site, so POAS in t-minus 8 hours give or take. So...

Today, I am terrified, with not POAS today, my fears multiply. I have had alot of pain in my lower stomach, & was on my feet today for my first day at the pharmacy. This make me nervous. Breathe, calm. Ok. That is so much easier to type then act that out. Everyone keeps saying stay positive & it isn't in my hands yada yada. BLAH!

Happier note, I LOVE ICLW! I want to personally thank all of you for the extraordinary upbeat & truly amazing comments you guys are getting me through this rough patch. With out all of you, Britney and of course Brandon. I would be a WRECk. From the bottom of my heart thank you! Now, we shall wait for the mail, & pray for a darker lineee!!!

am I the only one that 16 & pregnant makes you want to vom?

x's & oh's

ICLW 1st timer!!

7:49 AM
Good morning to all you ICLW's & regular fololwers!
This is my first time doing ICLW, & I'm excited for you all to read some of my journey! I figure I got all of you involved with this, I should clue you in. Since, I have not told anyone else really, maybe thinking I will jinx it, I do not know. Anyways, yesterday my line did indeed get darker, but still faint at about 9-10 DPO. & then I POAS this morning & got a BFP on a cheap-o. So many things are going through my mind, its amazing how you can be torn from amazingly unbelievably excited, to also being mortified. I think it stinks that after having one or more MC's it takes about from that initial joy. Anyway, I shall test the rest of the week, & sit, wait, wish, & pray! Anyone got a a remedy to make this one a sticky bean??? :p

Pictures when I have a more confident BFP.

The weather is cold this morning, that make me quite sad. I'm hoping it will warm up very soon. This coldness does nothing for my arthritis when it is sunny & warm, then the next day it is cold with the change of flurries! hmmph. Anyway, however you go about your day, I'm hoping you enjoy it & it is wonderful for you! :)

x's & oh's


10:02 PM
not what we were expecting i thought this cycle would to just go onto the other. im trying so hard not to get my hopes up.we will see if it gets darker within the next day or so. prayer i need prayer.

x's & oh's


12:48 PM
As the week comes to a end, AMEN TGIF! Who else went to Walmart at mid-night to get New Moon??  I just got home from my mini- vaca from Kentucky! While i was there I got "blog stalk" if you will a little bit more after Dr. F had told me that message boards and what not tend to help alot of women, I found blogs. I was excited yet sad that other women were gong through the same things I was & pouring their hearts out for people like me to read. These women I barely know got me through the past week or so, and for that, I thank you. Other than lifting my spirits I also learned so so much. So, with expecting AF any hour now, I'm for once hopeful this cycle that the end result could be a BFP with some of the stuff I have learned!

Now, to the stuff you wanna hear ;)
I had such a blast visiting everyone in Kentucky! My mini-vaca started with my cousin Tammy's big 4-0 birthday party, her surprise gift you ask? ME! haha, she was so surprised & just so excited to see each other!!
I was staying with my Aunt, & so excited to hang out with my younger cousin Michael for a week, it had been to long! Here are some snap shots of my week; more to come later, my camera died & I switched to the good ol BB & having a difficult time with my email server :S anyway ENJOY! :)

The was Tammy's cake, though off my diet, was DEE-LISH! shh don't tell I had a slice ;)

The birthday girl, mid-blow! hehe ;) Wonder what she wished for?!
Aunt Marlene, with Alex, Tammy & her families new puppy, I get so excited when people add a shi-tzu into their family  because I know how much I love mine :)

My younger cousin Ashley & 2nd Cousin Kimberly! :)

My Aunt, Tammy's Mom made candy bar covers that said, "Lordy, Lordy, Tammy's Forty" too cute!
Sleepy Donnie!  hahaha

Miss Emily, the last time I actually got to spend some time with this girly, she was in diapers!!

Hoping everyone has a wonderful weekend :) & to my family thank you so so much for letting me come stay with you guys to get away! & for the mr. gaddy's ;) 
& to my parents and little sister enjoy Florida, I will be here jealous.

there is etsy store (my fav place) & the Little Pink Dollhouse is having a giveaway! Def check her out! :) its super cute stuff!

x's & oh's

hope for the hopeless.

11:49 AM
could it be?
is it sad i take superficial things like this as hope?
either way it put a smile on my face :)

greetings from louis-vile,louie-ville,lo-ul-love

2:55 PM
Welp, after a rough few weeks in the life of Tara, I deicded while my Aunt Marlene was in town I would go back with her to a dear place in my heart, Louisvile, KY! I am going to be here for a week-if i can stand to be away from the dogs, oh & brandon ;) that long! So, far it has been amazing to see everyone!
We had a birthday party for Tammy (my cousin) at Aunt Renee's yesterday where i got to suprise her! Which i LOVED I love my time with her & Donnie & the kidd-os! (pictures will be up when i get back to Indiana)! So, ill just be blogging here & there about my trip!! I will be enjoying my time with Michael, Ashley & the rest of the Aldrich bunch, & im throughly excited! :)

For now, lets pray for some warmer weather, sunshine, & relaxation!
& everyone have a blessed week! :)

x's & oh's!

new bathroom!

11:54 AM
so we took on a weekend on project of our downstairs bathroom
here are the before & afters
i took the after pictures before it was all the way painted so ignore the paint behind the toilet! :)